#MondayMusings : Of Quarter Life Crisis
A few days ago when I was looking back on the posts I’d written a few years ago, I came across one that I’d written on my birthday two years ago. It was titled “My 25 by 25 list” . It was a list of 25 things that I wanted to do before I turned 25 because of quarter life crisis. I’ve less than 4 days to turn 25 and I had almost forgotten this list that I had made. It was time now to analyze how far I’d come in ticking things off from that list.
I don’t know if the list I’d made was too ambitious, for there were only a few things which I could definitely tick off the list. There were a lot of things – reading, writing, travel, learning new things, writing out letters and notes but I didn’t do a lot of them. But do I have any regrets? May be only for a thing or two that I really wanted to do but apart from those things, I’m all okay. I’m glad with the way I am.
Quarter life crisis almost made its way into my life when I was 23. So when I was 23, I made that list. 25 sounded like a long way ahead where I’d have achieved a lot and I’d have my life perfectly sorted. I can’t say I’ve achieved a lot of things and I definitely do not have my life sorted. Yes, I have a job that I like to do. But I still do not have an answer to what is it that I really want to do. Am I worried? No I’m not. While there was a time when I used to fret about not having achieved anything in life while my peers were doing great things, I am at peace now.
Because I know that I haven’t been wasting my life all this time. I know I’ve been doing something with my life rather than doing nothing. The things in the list that I made haven’t all been achieved. The things in the list my mom may have mentally made for me to achieve by 25 may not have been achieved. The society also would have made a list of things that I should have done by 25 which I haven’t done so far. But all along, I’ve done things that made me happy. I didn’t live by any list, but I lived by what I wanted to do at that particular time. I did achieve a lot of things that weren’t on that list. I did things that made me happy. That’s not all! There were times when others found solace in the words I wrote. Isn’t that an achievement?
The fear of missing out is always there. But if you are doing something that you enjoy doing, then there’s nothing you are missing out on. The constant comparisons with others serve no good, all that they do is reduce your self confidence. I’ve told myself as long as I’m doing something worthwhile and taking steps to improve myself I’m good, no matter how small those steps are. I’ve begun to care less about what others have to say about the things that I do. That gives me peace.
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I’ve gone in different ways and discovered myself even better. The list I’d made was from a 23 year old’s perspective and not all of those things connect with my almost 25 year old self now. These 25 years have made me who I am and the journey continues!
P.S. : If you are wondering, birthday is on the 19th of January 😛
Linking this to Monday Musings at Everyday Gyaan.