#AtoZChallenge : Stop this Train
A Saturday morning. Being one of those lazy kind of days when I didn’t have to rush to office nor have grand plans for the weekend, I decided to back to sleep. Though I tossed and turned on the bed, I couldn’t get any sleep. The weather was cloudy, slightly gloomy for the sunny morning that I prefer waking up to. The wind was more of a mad rush rather than the gentle breeze that I loved. I don’t know if it was the weather or the fact that I was alone in my room, I began to feel lonely. And that loneliness slowly made way to sadness.
When I was a little girl, I wanted to grow up and be an adult. I could be independent and I could make my own decisions. When I was a teenager, I wanted to live away from home. A new city, a new beginning and new dreams to turn to reality. I used to fight with my mom and ask her to let me study in a different city so that I could stay in a hostel. But my mom being the overprotective mother that she is, never let me stay in a hostel.
And then finally came that day, when I landed a job which required me to go to a new city. I was on cloud nine though I knew that I’d miss home sooner or later. My mom was happy for me but I could see that she was worried about me. I’d assured that I’d be okay and that I would take good care of myself.
That was 2 years ago.
Today all I wanted to do was to go back home. I kept asking myself why did I even grow up. Life was so much simpler and happier then. I could stay at home and enjoy all the love that was showered on me be it in the form of yummy food, care when I was sick, a good listener when I just wanted to speak my heart out. I know I could go home if I wanted to. But I knew a couple of days at home weren’t what I wanted. I wanted to back in time and let time freeze.
I’d grown up and I was independent. I was capable of taking care of myself, yet I felt this was going all too quickly. Life was moving faster than I’d imagined. I just wanted it to stop so that I could go back and be that little girl all over again. I wanted my childhood back. A tiny tear rolled down my cheeks. I wish I could just go back home.
Just then my phone rang. No prizes for guessing whose call it was.
“Hello Alana. How is my little girl doing? All okay? Did you have breakfast? Did you sleep well?”
“Yes Mumma”, I said wiping away my tears.
“Are you okay? You sound a little sad.”
“I’m okay Mumma, it is just the weather. Mumma, I had to tell you something.”
“What is it?”
“I love you! And I miss you!”
“I love you a lot Alana. And I miss having you around. Come home as soon as you get some days off okay?”
I wanted to go home right then!
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5BTzNX5OMN4&w=600&h=360 ]
I’m participating in the A to Z Challenge and all through April I’ll be writing about the Life and Times of a Twenty something! What are you best memories or expectations from your twenties? Let me know in the comments.
Being an adult is hard, but you are lucky to have such a wonderful family who supports your decisions. Lean on them when you are down, but don’t be afraid to explore more on your own. Good luck!
I have been through this stage. Being on your own liberates you at the same time it gets really lonely. It’s only then that you realize how valuable it is to have your family around you.
Awwwwwww, hugs to Alana! Growing up sucks sometimes, but it is fun most of times I’d say! For instance I could never shop Online if I was a kid again! Perks!:))))
I love this description Reema, combining freedom and our inner emotional self to touch base to stay rooted. Brilliant.
Alas. You can never go home again…..
Awwww. Stories of our life, no? I fought so much to join hostel and now I miss home too. There are days when it is bearable but then there are days when it is too much. How I wish I could go back in time and freeze it to when I was still a kid!
We always want to the other happier times whether in the past or into the future. That’s human nature. But one person who will always be there in all times is MOM.
Alana speaks the heart of so many of us buddy. We all have faced this at some stage of life. Love the series.
I remember how weird I felt leaving for a hostel for the first time… after spending the whole teenage life with parents, it was a major culture shock. And yes, mom’s call would always be there every evening once mobile phones came into the picture.
Sarah Hoidahl – A Lovely Real Life Story of Kindness and Karma
Adulting is a trap, alright. So enjoy the time with our loved ones while we have it. Because no matter how much we want it to, the train never stops.
Proud of you for being independent!
Scenes from a Marriage #Lexicon of Leaving
Aww..this is such a sweet post and I want to hug Alana right now. Each stage has its own positives and negatives. But agree its no fun being a grown up , childhood was the best but we realise this only when we grow up. 🙂
Very sweet post Reema.We all wish to have what we cant!Plus rarely appreciate what we do.
Being an adult doesn’t live up to its reputation. It gets better, though.
yeah, it happens, at every stage of our life we want to be something else….and life goes on…
Moreover we can understand the affectionate feeling of our parents only when we have kids….its natural you know….
Stay blessed 🙂
Ahh!! How true, this is a feeling that starts at 20 something and I believe we keep feeling this way forever after that. I am 30 something I feel this way I don’t know how many times!!
staying away from home during the initial days were tough… you tend to feel homesick… but that’s how we learn and grow up, we gain experiences of our own. But one thing remains the same – mums never stop worrying 🙂
Staying away from home does this to all of us! First, we want to leave our house and live alone, independently and then we have get everything we prayed for all our lives, we want to go back in time! But who knew the present is always beautiful?
Awwwww, come here, Alana, lemme hug you… 🙂 <3
I know that feeling well. Often, I wish about going back in time and being a kid in my parents’ home. It was happy and simple.
~Patricia Lynne aka Patricia Josephine~
Patricia Lynne, Indie Author
That feeling is so gripping and real to me!! Don’t be sad Alana!!
Home and your parent’s love is always with you 🙂
Social stigmas are a bane for our societies. Lets not give in.
Readers of the Night
Ah! This is the story of our life. We all go through this phase. Sadly, there’s no going back…